Tuesday, June 29, 2010

A bit frustrated

Today I have been thinking a lot about Jason's job situation.  I thought that I would sit down and see if I could find anything out there for him.  I wish I hadn't.  After about 2 hours of searching on website after website I only felt more concerned and disheartened.  There is nothing out there, well unless me move to Texas, New York or California.  Originally when Jason lost his job I thought "ok at most he will be out of work for about 6 months".  Which at that time I thought I was being a little far out there considering that Jason felt it would be a month or two.  Now as we are approaching the 6 month mark and after my little research I feel that it could easily be a year or more before he is employed again.  Dare I even say 1 1/2 to 2 years.  It's very difficult to think that we could have to deal with this for another year or more, which I hope we don't, but we have no idea how long it could actually be.  It's just so depressing and I'm tired of our home not being a happy home.

On the baby front, it appears that AF has finally started.  I started spotting about an hour ago and the cramps have begun.  It's ok though, even though it's heartbreaking, it was worse being in the limbo of being late and getting a BFN then AF actually getting here.  So clomid it is.  I can't actually count today as cd 1 because you have to count your first whole day of flow as day 1, so tomorrow it will be.  I will start taking the pills on Friday through Tuesday.  Hopefully this will do the trick because I'm not sure what else to do. 

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